Freedom from Anger and Confusion

I thought I'd share my story....

I grew up in a divorced home like a lot of teenagers. I was raised by a loving mother and stepfather. My stepfather was an alcoholic making things particularly tough. My stepfather’s combination of drinking and shady business dealings led him into massive debt, driving him to commit suicide. Mom told me he took his own life which plunged my existence into a sea of confusion, anger and bitterness. I needed answers, yet couldn’t find any. At twelve years of age, the only wisdom I knew was to bottle up my feelings and share with know one how I felt.

Jeff’s death forced an emotional growth I was not prepared for. I had to take care of my little brother who was too young to know anything. I used to sit at my Mothers bedside while she poured her heart out and cried. It was the most awful time I’ve ever experienced.

A couple of years later Mom remarried and we moved to Hawaii. I thought, “great! Hawaii was the perfect place to lose these old memories and start over.” This wasn’t the case. My anger began to build like a ticking time bomb. My friends nicknamed me “Mt Sartain”, like a volcano waiting to erupt. The smallest thing would set me off. As a result, my friends and family suffered.

About a year later I received an invitation from my Father to live with him in San Diego and start a new life. As a last resort, Mom thought it best I do this. My grades had slipped; I was smoking marijuana and was hanging out with the wrong crowd. At this point it was a good change.

Shortly after arriving in San Diego my new family lavished love upon me like I'd never felt before. They decorated my new room with baseball pennants and skateboard memorabilia. I was treated as a king. I knew from this point a decision had to be made about dealing with my anger. After a couple of weeks Dad sat me down and told me Jesus loved me; that if I released my life into His Hands he'd give me peace and eliminate my frustrations. I declined that day but couldn’t get out of my head what he said. I sat on my bed that night and said to God, “I don’t know who you are but I’m going to give you this much (as I held up my pinched fingers in the air showing God exactly what he was going to get from me.) And you have to do with what little I give you. Amen!” I didn’t feel any different at the moment but I slept that night like I’d never slept before. I woke up with a peace I can’t explain. Jesus took the table crumb of my life and made it a meal. He took what little I gave him and in return gave me what I really wanted. Peace. The anger was suddenly gone. I was free like I’ve never been free before. I started attending church regularly and joined some Bible studies. I grew so much in those first three years of my faith. I’ll never forget it.

At age twenty two God called me into ministry. I was reluctant as I kicked and screamed to deny HIS call but, couldn’t deny it was His will. You know when God wants you to do something because it’s the hardest thing to do. He gave me Ezekiel Chapter three which says.. And He said to me, "Son of man, stand on your feet, and I will speak to you." Then the Spirit entered me when He spoke to me, and set me on my feet; and I heard Him who spoke to me. I fell on my knees after reading that passage and gave my life to the Lord once more. Daily surrender is crucial in living for Jesus. I felt a tremendous peace from that time on determined to serve God with all I had. Within three weeks of making that commitment I met my beautiful wife Tara, I landed a job at one of the most exclusive resorts in the world and a missionary from Crete paid my entire tuition for school. I couldn’t believe it!

He sent a good friend, Daniel Wilson, to disciple me. Many nights we’re spent in his one bedroom apartment with commentary’s, lexicons, different translations of the Bible on his floor, searching the scriptures and being blown away by the truth’s discovered about the Lord.

After graduation, Tara and I we’re married and we embarked on a series of ministry opportunities. Over the next six years God showed me what and what not to do. The most valuable lessoned learned was teach God’s Word, book by book, chapter by chapter, verse by verse, as it says in Isaiah 28:10 - For precept must be upon precept, line upon line, Here a little, there a little." I caught the vision for North Carolina desiring to serve under my father. Dad has blessed me as the best Father and spiritual mentor in the world. He’s my hero and other than Jesus, he’s the best example I’ve ever known.

We finally moved to North Carolina in the spring of 2002 and have been here ever since. I’m so excited about Horizon and what God is doing here. He’s changing one life at a time in ways I’ve never expected. He’s richly blessed me with my beautiful wife Tara and four wonderful children in Sophia, Caden, Sage & Miles.

I thank men like Mike Macintosh, Chuck Smith, Jon Courson, Dr. David Jeremiah, Miles Macpherson, and others who God used as vessels to shape me. I’m so grateful.

Revelation 6:6

Rev 6:6 And I heard what seemed to be a voice in the midst of the four living creatures, saying, "A quart of wheat for a denarius, and three quarts of barley for a denarius, and do not harm the oil and wine!"

After the rapture of the church takes place Jesus will open the 7 seals and release the 4 horseman of the apocalypse. The first horse describes a rider with a bow and no arrows, which I believe to be Antichrist as he'll conquer the world without firing a shot. The second horse, being red, has a sword and war follows him. After him, a black horse comes with scales in his hand which which the Bible always uses to symbolize the marketplace and money transactions (Prov 16:11, Isa 46:6, Jer 32:10 etc). This vs says that a quart of wheat will cost a "whole days" worth of income. Think about that. How much do you make in one day? Now think of your whole days wage buying only one loaf of bread!

SO with that, I'd like to share an article I found regarding the ug99 virus strain effecting part of the world's wheat population. This is no secret yet amazingly I've not seen it in the American media, unless someone else has seen it. Be ready with anticipation for the the Lord's return is near!

http://www.farmandranchguide.com/articles/2008/03/13/ag_news/production_news/pro10.txt

Which Way?

John 14:6 Jesus said to him, "I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.

Jesus responded to Thomas confusion about what that “way” was. Thomas was thinking of a location but Jesus was speaking about a person. The way is Jesus. Let me explain. What if my 5 year old son came up to me and said, “Dad, I’m not feeling well. I want to go home and rest.” Would I say to him, “Son, I’m sorry you’re sick. I understand. Now follow my instructions very carefully. Walk out the front door and turn right. Go down Highway 160 till you get to highway 49 and hang a right. Go about 18 miles into town and turn left on Congress Street and it’s the 4th house on the right. Hope you feel better son. I’ll see you at home.” As a loving father I would never do that! I would pick him up in my arms and take him where he needed to go. It’s the same with us. It’s never a destination we need to get to but rather its simply being with and enjoying Jesus and, as a loving savior; he’ll take us to where we need to go in life. Next time you ask yourself, “where in the heck should I go in this job, finances, relationship, etc?” Run to the way, the truth and the life. Run to Jesus and you’ll arrive at your destination. You'll find the peace you long for, being in the arms of your savior who’ll take you to places you never dreamed.

Quiet Already!

Isaiah 30:15 For thus said the Lord God , the Holy One of Israel, "In returning and rest you shall be saved; in quietness and in trust shall be your strength." But you were unwilling

The Assyrians we’re breathing down the Jews necks. They we’re forming an attack and Israel was seeking protection from Egypt their other enemy! They saw the military might and the grandeur of their country thinking an alliance with them would bring peace and protection. They refused to get before the Lord in quietness and trust to be strengthened and delivered from their circumstances.

Why is it when trouble comes we turn to fruitless things rather than the Lord Himself? What is the answer when our Assyrian problems come to us? It’s to Retreat in “quietness” with Jesus. Deliverance always comes in rest and quiet before God. The only way to seek “strength” is not through making alliances with Credit cards, alcohol, pornography, comfort food or TV, but through quieting ourselves before God and let Him save us. We actually prevent Jesus from saving us when we try and save ourselves. But, when we’re still, He comes through and frees us. The Lord commanded Moses “Stand still” and see God’s salvation…Exodus 14:13. God told David “Be still” before the Lord and wait patiently for him”…Psalm 37:7. Naomi told Ruth to “sit still” until her redeemer took care of her concern…Ruth 3:18. Ladies and gentleman, God will do amazing things for you in coming to Him in silence and solitude. You’ll receive a vision, an encouragement, a lift into the heavenlies by simply being still and watching Him move heaven and earth on your behalf.

Check Your Casserole

Act 9:31 So the church throughout all Judea and Galilee and Samaria had peace and was being built up. And walking in the fear of the Lord and in the comfort of the Holy Spirit, it multiplied.

The other day, my wife was making a cheese casserole dish for dinner. The recipe called for rice, ground beef and sharp cheddar cheese. She had forgotten to put the main ingredient in; the cheese. As we sat down to eat it tasted kind of bland. There wasn’t really any flavor to it when she realized, “Oh my gosh! I forgot the cheese!” As I was reading this verse I noticed there we’re two “key” ingredients that gave the church peace
1. Fear
2. Comfort
Seems like an oxymoron for both to work together doesn’t it? However, we need both to have satisfaction in Jesus. If all you think about is the “fear” of the Lord (Which also means a “healthy” respect of the Lord) you’ll live a life of bondage. It’s “all” sharp cheese and no casserole. Then again, if all you dwell on is Jesus comfort without a healthy respect of Him you’ll have all casserole with no cheese. You’ll have a life that’s bland and tasteless. You have to know God’s holiness and judgment before you can have Gods peace. Peace begins with understanding who we really are and fearing God in His holiness. The Bible says, Pro 9:10 The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One is insight. It starts with a healthy respect of who Jesus is then it causes us to seek comfort from Him. He is more than willing to give freely His comfort but comfort is not comfort if we do not fear God first. Do you have peace? Are you walking in the “fear” and “comfort” of Jesus? If not, check your casserole. You may be missing a key ingredient.

You're a Star Baby!

Genesis 1:15 and let them be lights in the expanse of the heavens to give light upon the earth." And it was so.

I find this fascinating. This of course is the account of creation in the first chapter of Genesis but is an anti type of how God made us. Isn’t it interesting that stars are only stars when they give off light? That is their purpose. In fact, God possibly equated the messengers of Revelation 1:20 as stars which could possibly be translated as pastors. They are light givers. The same is true for you and me. If we want “to be” the light we must “give light” to those around us. We are not fulfilling our purpose as Christians if we are not giving off light. So now the question is how do we reflect the light of Jesus. Here are just a few ways you can “give” light.

1. Learn to “listen” to people. People feel cared for when listened to. Try to refrain talking about yourself only when asked. People are interested in people who are interested in them. Ask questions like: “what do you do for a living?” “what do you like to do for fun?” “What drives you?” “How do you feel about etc….?” When you “listen” you are “giving” to that person.
2. Invite someone in your neighborhood over for dinner. Sounds simple but most people don’t do it. Invite someone you don’t know real well. It will make them feel loved and your light will shine.
3. When you go through say a McDonald's drive through, buy the person’s meal behind you. When you get to the pay window, tip the employee and hand him a card from your church to give to the person whose meal you just paid. Ask him to tell the person receiving the blessing, “today is your lucky day. The person in front of you paid for your meal. He wants you to know God loves you.” Have the teller hand him the card. Imagine the impact you’ll have on everyone involved!
4. Pray for people right then and there. We often say, “I’ll pray for you”, but how often do we really pray after the fact. Praying for people right then and there will have a big impact on their life.
5. When you’re at a gas station offer to put 5 or 10 bucks in their tank. With gas prices today that will make a huge impact on their life.
6. Keep bottled water in your car and offer it when you’re putting groceries in your trunk in the parking lot of a grocery store or wherever.
7. Make a pie and deliver it to a neighbor you don’t know. Make sure you make it in a glass dish so you can go back and talk to them again and share the love of Jesus.
8. Buy some roses and give them to a widow. The Bible says James 1:27 Pure religion and undefiled before God and the Father is this, To visit the fatherless and widows in their affliction, [and] to keep himself unspotted from the world.
   

The possibilities are endless! Let’s get outside the four walls of the church and make a difference in people’s lives and for the kingdom of God.

Figure out Peace?

Philippians 4:6-7 - do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

I was listening to a message by Pastor Jon Courson the other day from Harvest Christian Fellowship in Riverside CA. He was speaking on behalf of Pastor Greg Laurie and giving perspective when his own wife and daughter went to heaven to be with the Lord. He related how God spoke to him as he was ironing his daughters dress for church. This was shortly after his wife's passing. He asked the Lord, "Why Lord? I don't understand." He said the Lord spoke clearly and said "Jon, didn't I promise that I would give you peace that surpasses understanding?" Jon said "Yes Lord you did." The Lord said "Jon, stop trying to get peace by understanding." What a powerful word for all of us! We would get the peace we all need by simply believing God at His Word that "we have" peace at our disposal anytime we need it. If you lack peace in your life stop trying to figure out why and simply believe God that He's working your situation out for good.